A Conversation about Happiness, Choice, and Logic

​Author(s): Fabian Ermisch & Niki Christine
Author's Note: This exchange began with a comment on a philosophy video discussing the concepts of freedom, choice, and fate in a realistic world- and has since turned into an insightful conversation regarding the experience of existence, logic, and happiness- that I am very thankful to have been a part of. Though not a typical submission style, it was the preferred style by Fabian. 
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To give a bit of context before starting: the video discusses the emotional difficulties/anxieties that come with being constantly aware of your freedom while also being aware of how little freedom you actually have, because of the external world and systems in place which limit it. Also, the video that started this conversation is called “it’s normal to be afraid of being alive sometimes - A Philosophy of Freedom, Choice, and Fate,” if you’re interested in watching! 

I hope you enjoy getting to eavesdrop a bit, and if you have any thoughts of your own on these topics, please feel free to submit them and continue the conversation!

Fabian: After working out, I feel cleansed in a sense. I feel like I'm in a state I always should be in, yet I'm not. It's like it's easy to change the state but difficult to change the mechanism which gets you in that state. I feel like we can only truly change - change the mechanism - if we can look at ourselves from another perspective. Like, detaching. From my experience, this only happened in more intense life situations. For me one of these was experienced with psychedelics. Also, something like holidays and exploring new things can give you this new perspective. The difficult thing is to get there, I think like you kind of said, because you need the necessities like money which seems to only tighten the chains which keeps us limited. In this way, we run the danger of getting stuck, maybe for longer times. However, this feeling can pent up and free us again, like an equation which zeroes out.. at least that's my experience. 

Niki: I really like the point you made, “it’s easy to change the state but difficult to change the mechanism which gets you in that state.” I think that’s an interesting, and great point. Detachment, as well, is a great thing to bring up. You mention working out, and it makes me think about the meditative states we can enter during things like exercise or meditation itself- and to detach is to not be overcome with external influence. Even though there are things outside of us that can keep us from reaching that mental state of detachment, I agree with your idea that experiencing and doing things that can give you more/new perspectives is helpful. While we cannot escape the influence and noise of the outside world, we can try and find some sense of escape through ourselves. 

Fabian: You know what, I really like that point myself :P. I feel like I knew it all along, but just thanks to your video, I got reminded about it. But isn't this interesting? In this case, you could express something which I couldn't, but this made me express something which maybe you couldn't. Maybe it's like we all are - or hold - a piece/pieces of a puzzle. And at the end of our life, we probably think we got the full picture, even though it's just a small part of the whole. Or do we really know it all ourselves and just need some reminders here and there? Or some input, as to how to express it? And "all" would imply that we can have unlimited perspectives just from within. And like you mentioned, get access with those meditative states by quieting the external noise. Well, as I'm writing it, both make sense - or am I contradicting myself? I would like to hear what you think about this, maybe it'll cause a "ripple effect" like before.

Niki: This ripple effect is interesting, and I think it is part of what makes conversations such as these so meaningful- the opportunity to hear others put into words something you’ve been trying to, and hopefully getting to do that for someone else, too. I think that is the case here! I think those are all valid questions, and I think part of philosophy is accepting the inevitable contradictions and inconsistencies that come with being human. I think it might be a combination of both. I think it is impossible to know “all,” but I think we know- without even realizing- so much more than we could imagine. To that, I think it is the little reminders and new perspective that we can find, such as through conversations like these, that makes us remember something we had always known, we just didn’t have a reason to know it- yet. I am not sure that makes sense entirely, but I am hoping it does in some ways or another? Telepathy would certainly be useful but I think a lot of what makes a conversation interesting is the process of trying to work-out and understand someone else’s words! 

Fabian: I feel what you say - we as humans are flawed and can't really grasp what's really going on. Or logic probably isn't universal - I feel like our ways of thinking are merely a subset of a universal logic (if there even is such a thing). That would explain why we struggle to explain/express some things (because we never will, but even so, the process is interesting). But to connect this to what you said next - there is beauty in being a flawed human being. (so many "beings") Trying to understand someone else is indeed a very interesting process. Like, we have our preconceptions of what they think and feel but that's very limited, because it's based on our own thoughts and feelings of course. But if we succeed in doing this, we feel this sense of oneness and connection. Like "well, this person is just like me, we just express it differently.” I mean, we are all similar and want similar things. I think it's very important to remind yourself about this, because especially in this day and age I feel like we are more disconnected than ever - even though it should be the opposite (well, this is a topic for itself). But it is indeed the process which makes things interesting. Like, winning a million dollars probably wouldn't make you really happy because there is no struggle in this. Or cheating in a video game. But do we always have to struggle to get something which makes us happy? I think that's also an interesting thought, because if we are born into a happy family we don't have to struggle but we feel happy. Or do we then become spoiled which leads us to struggle in the long run - like, the price we pay. I mean, of course it's not as simple as this, I'd like to hear your thoughts about this. And about knowing "all". I agree and disagree with you at the same time. (and what you are saying makes sense to me by the way). The question is, what it means to "know all". If we say experiencing everything directly I tend to agree. But I also had this thought once, that our current experience is like the sum of all other experiences out there. Like, everything combined equals you. Well, I know, it's a bit out there but this is yet another thing to think about.

Niki: I think the idea of universal logic is really interesting. As we communicate with others, there are a lot of moments that I think can show tiny bits of this showing through- though I do not think there is a complete universal logic that is accessible or completely applicable to humanity. For example, there might be a universal logic to describe the nature of a universe itself- a science that is continuously being developed through studies, such as physics. However, a universal, internal human conceptualized logic seems unrealistic, considering the immense subjectivity of our thoughts, feelings, and experiences. I think you touched on this by mentioning the way we have our own preconceptions, based on our own experiences, that we will project onto other people and the things they tell us- therefore we do not always see them clearly or understand completely. However, I agree with you. Despite this, we find undeniable similarity within each other- but the world is becoming a more and more disconnected place in terms of physical, in person connection, so this might be a dying experience. As for the potential need for struggle to truly be happy, I think struggle is both necessary and unnecessary to achieve a state of happiness. When we experience something horrible, and we know pain, it allows us to truly know happiness- because we know its opposite. However, even if a person never experienced any struggle, the natural human ability to experience emotions would not be erased, and happiness would still be possible- I think it would be less appreciated, however, and a person like this would not know the term to describe what they are feeling, because they know nothing else. 

Fabian: This conversation brought up something really interesting: the dualistic nature which our world seems to have. Like, dark and light, bad and good, etc. We can appreciate the one more, only if we know the other. But even so, like you said, it's not impossible to feel happiness for example without the struggle. But if that is true, would there really be a need for gratitude by knowing how things could be otherwise? Or is it gratitude itself which makes us happy? I think that's interesting, because I really feel like gratitude is like a cheat code. Anytime we can choose to be grateful for something and we'll instantly feel better. About universal logic, I think I agree with you. If we think about universal logic like a spirit which possesses everything there is - through this act of possession it gets tainted by that being which is also disconnected from the rest. But the funny thing about writing this is that we write this with our human logic. So yeah we'll probably never really know - still, like you, I also feel like we get tiny bits of it showing through from time to time. Also, it now seems to me as though we are talking about god.
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Niki: Gratitude is an interesting concept to bring up. To be happy is nice, but to truly be grateful that you are happy is almost like doubling the good feelings. For some reason the scenario coming to my head about this is someone, a generally happy person, dropping their ice cream- and they're still happy, but when they get another one, they’re even happier because this one didn’t end up splattered all over the ground. Sort of like, the good things- no matter how small they are- are even better when you can appreciate it. The idea of gratitude being a cheat code is something I would never have considered. But I think there is something to be said for the way our mood can improve with just a perspective switch- kinda like having a shitty day but being grateful for the fact you're alive at all, even if it currently feels shitty to be. Changing the way you think about the day, even if it's hard sometimes, can bring on some happiness that you can’t find otherwise. 

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