Category: A Confession

You Grant the World a Greater Life

9/21/2023

The world would be smaller without you in it.

There would be one less soul to experience its existence. There would be less ground covered because your feet would not be there to find it. There would be fewer colors to see because your eyes would not be there to see them. The oceans would begin to shallow without your weight. There would be fallen trees that never got the chance to be heard. Everyone, and everything deserves the chance to be heard. There are sounds, sights, touches, feelings- and an infinite number of things more- that exist solely to be experienced by you. They were born for you. They are written in a language that can only ever be read by you. They do not exist the same for anyone else.

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The Erosion of Empathy

9/13/2023

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I worry that I will not be worthy if I am not in pain.

If I am not hurting, how can I be capable of helping?

I used to know the right thing to say. When I sat beside someone tired and trembling from tears, I did not worry about saying something that would cause the sobs to grow louder. When I was met with a person whose face was raging and red with anger, I knew how to scream with them- and I knew what to scream. To create a sense of harmony between myself and someone overcome with emotion was a skill that, at one point, I thought I had. Conceitedly so, maybe- but I would be lying if I said that saying the wrong thing was a common fear of mine.

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To Be or Not to Be - A Life for You or Me?

8/28/2023

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To give my life for yours is a decision I don't have to decide.

I have this constant, nagging urge to sacrifice my life for the sake of someone else's. It has gotten worse with age, and it gets unbearably worse in the moments I am most gratified. It is especially heightened on the days I find glimpses of the pleasure I have spent and continue to spend much of my life looking for. These blessed feelings always seem to slip out of my grip- stuck in an endless cycle of being caught and being lost. This is a universal experience, the push and pull of good and bad. An inescapable consequence of life. That is okay. It is what lets us know what makes these great feelings so great, anyway.

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To Speak Without Hurting

7/6/2023

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I will never know enough to speak.

This is the overwhelming anxiety that often stops my tongue from letting the sentences, begging to be said, spill out. The transitions from wanting to learn, learning, and wanting to share are seamless, running along an innately tethered pipeline. It is unnatural to take all that we have to give- all that we want to give- and squeeze it into a box too small and put it in a corner too messy. There is no peace in a crowded room where the door is locked shut. The suppression of voice is a social, and self silencer that bombards and melts the mind.

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Sharing my
humanity

Categories

Archives

You Grant the World a Greater Life

The Erosion of Empathy

To Be or Not to Be - A Life for You or Me?

To Speak Without Hurting

Sharing my humanity

Categories

Archives

You Grant the World a Greater Life

The Erosion of Empathy

To Be or Not to Be - A Life for You or Me?

To Speak Without Hurting

Sharing my
humanity